No! These are just strippers! Look how hot they are! Yeah, like I'm going to take a whiz through this $5,000 suit. COME ON. I'm not a prostitute. Michael: Then I shall let you live! Okay, Lindsay, are you forgetting that I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world's first analrapist.
1. This Is One
Heyyyyyy, Uncle Father Oscar. Friend of mine from college. He also has a boat tho not called the Seaward. I didn't mean who… I meant… her? I know what an erection feels like, Michael. No, it's the opposite. It's like my heart is getting hard.
Oh, I'm sorry, I forgot… your wife is dead! I'm not interested in you that way. Tobias: What way? Michael: Pick one. The only thing more terrifying than the escaped lunatic's hook was his twisted call… Heyyyyy campers! I run a pretty tight ship around here. With a pool table. It's a gaming ship. YOU'RE the Chiclet! Not me. Caw ca caw, caw ca caw, caw ca caw!
2. This Is Two
Uncle Gob, was Aunt Lindsay ever pregnant? Yeah, sure, dozens of times. If you're suggesting I play favorites, you're wrong. I love all of my children equally. I don't care for Gob. I'm not interested in you that way. Tobias: What way?Michael: Pick one.

And here you are coming out of your mother's third base! I've always been deeply passionate about nature. Perhaps you remember Neuterfest?¬†M:¬†I'll never forget your wedding. If I look like a man who made love to his wife last night ‚Äď it's because I almost did. I will pack your sweet pink mouth with so much ice cream you'll be the envy of every Jerry and Jane on the block! She calls it a mayonegg. What a fun, sexy time for you. That was Tom Cruise, the actor.Lucille:¬†They said he was some kind of scientist.